In this ceremony, we brought to mind what I wanted to released and then my friend had me cut a piece of cord as many times as I wanted. We then went outside and burned the piece of cord. As I watched it burn and shrivel up, I actually felt a sense of relief. A therapist once asked me, if you were met and seen the ways you needed to be when you were younger how would you show up differently today? Our past experiences shape the way we show up in our lives and it can feel truly healing and powerful to begin to imagine if these past moments played out differently, how would we be showing up for ourselves and with others in a new light and what steps could we even take today to make that image a reality?
Cutting ties not only pertains to those we have needed to say goodbye to from our past, but also to release former identities we had taken on or past habits and patterns that are just no longer serving us in the present. We often adopt the habits of our parents and friends when we are a child or teenager to make sure we feel like we fit in and belong. As we grow older, to individuate sometimes we need to say goodbye to ways of being that actually don't truly resonate with the individual we are transforming into today. There can be a grieving process that occurs in saying goodbye to certain patterns as those habits were often created at a time when we needed them. If you are cutting the cords in anywhere in your life, give yourself time to grieve, to say goodbye, and to even explore what would you like to bring into that new space into your life that other individuals or past parts of you were taking up space?